Monday, October 29, 2012

Miss Information is sick of smiling

These past couple of years, Miss Information has carefully managed her career with one single goal in mind. She has dressed badly, neglected combing her hair for days on end, and has chosen a job that channels much of the human interaction through electronic devices. All this has been to avoid appearing in public. So on Friday, Miss Information was a bit annoyed to find herself the morning speaker at a library conference.

Miss Information had a script that she inherited from the previous holder of the job. She had sensibly gotten out without ever having to use it. She was sincere, dedicated and professional and her presentation was full of important statistics, loads of documentation, and even a few significant references. She also dresses nicely and combs her hair and would have been an awesome speaker.

Miss Information took that beautiful presentation and ditched the Powerpoint. Miss Information bloody hates Powerpoint--thank you, grad school. Then she removed all the relevant stuff and added pictures of Matt Smith, Jimi Hendrix and Julie Andrews. Never let it be said that she doesn't pull her weight.

She arrived at the venue early and started smiling at everyone. She was trying to build good will. Then she began drinking coffee. She had 4 cups before her presentation started. She actually began sweating coffee right before her introduction.

She did her presentation and remarkably no one died. People she didn't know actually came up to her after and said they enjoyed it. Of course she had to smile at them. Basically she was trapped into smiling at everyone for an entire damn day. She must have looked like a scary cult member. 

Her face still hurts days later.

5 Comments:

At 12:00 PM, Blogger SmartLib said...

Your posts always make me happy that I chose to go into Technical Services. At my library I *never* have to work a desk - hell, most days I don't even go out on the floor when we're open so I can avoid all contact with patrons. Best job ever! As for public speaking, that would never happen - I loathe and despise it and would refuse categorically to do it. I'm sure you were interesting and fun (as is your writing) but I do not have 1/10th of your wit and talent.

 
At 12:16 PM, Blogger looloolooweez said...

If you're as relatable in person as your are on this blog, I'm sure your presentation was really just a hoot for everyone! :)

 
At 2:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ooh, I think I know you!! I was in grad school when you were, but I dropped out. Now I am just a clerk again at a university library. I love your blog and it makes me happy because hating power book is a rare librarian talent that I respect and admire!!

 
At 2:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Power point, I meant!!

 
At 12:14 PM, Blogger Cheryl said...

I enjoy your posts. I spend a few hours in public service everyday and then off to the basement I go to catalog books and do the social media thing for a public library. This would be the best job ever if i never left the basement.

 

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